Remember the missing trigger warning in Blink Twice? Well, The Crow has a trigger warning, but it is the wrong one. The Crow should have come with a warning for toe-curling dialogue and flat characters sharing zero chemistry. Based on James O’Barr’s iconic comic book series and Alex Proyas’s visually stunning 1994 film, this needless reboot directed by Rupert Sanders (known for directing the Foundation pilot) moves at the pace of congealing gum at a deserted post office.
The Crow, the fifth film in the franchise, begins with a dying horse (black marks for animal violence). The horse is caught in barbed wire, and a young boy attempts to set it free. The traumatized boy, Eric (Bill Skarsgård), grows up struggling with addiction; meanwhile, a pianist named Shelley (FKA Twigs) also grapples with addiction. When her friend Zadie (Isabella Wei) sends her a video, Shelley goes on the run from Roeg (Danny Huston), a patron of the arts and a crime lord who has made a deal with the devil.
Shelly is sent to rehab by the cops, where she meets Eric. When Marian (Laura Birn), Roeg’s right-hand person, arrives at the rehab, the two flee. They hang out at Shelley’s friend’s ritzy apartment and fall in love as they party the nights away. However, their bliss is short-lived as Roeg’s henchmen find the duo and kill them. Eric wakes up in an abandoned train station and meets Cronos (Sami Bouajila), who tells him he is in a purgatory-style halfway house. As long as his love remains pure, he is invincible. With that, the sluggish rampage of revenge begins as Eric sets out to dispatch the wicked in the hopes of reuniting with his one true love.
Disappointingly, the production design is one of the few redeeming qualities of the film. The soundscape, even when not compared to the 1994 movie—which featured bands like Stone Temple Pilots, The Cure, and Nine Inch Nails—does provide a trippy atmosphere. However, that’s about all one can positively note about this glacially-paced movie.
. The operatic violence at the climax—intercut with actual operatic performances—is gratuitous and fails to add any deeper significance to the narrative.
Unfortunately, Twigs and Skarsgård exhibit no chemistry, making it impossible for viewers to genuinely invest in their love story. There’s no sense of a timeless love; it feels more like they are together out of convenience rather than any deep connection. The leaden dialogues do nothing to salvage their lackluster interactions. The sluggish pace and jumbled plot further complicate matters, with the all-important video functioning more as a filler than a driving element of the story.
The inclusion of the crow—an essential symbol that connects to themes of ancestors and rebirth in Hindu mythology—seems like an afterthought, floating about vaguely in the frame, much like other pointless characters. These include Shelley’s mother Sophia (Josette Simon) and a nameless pianist who merely makes googly eyes at Roeg. There was a fleeting moment during a chase scene when the regenerating Eric brought to mind a Gothic Terminator. However, this was quickly revealed to be nothing more than a mirage in a wasteland of creative imagination.
Ultimately, The Crow fails to meet the high standards set by its predecessors. Instead of breathing new life into the franchise, this reboot serves as a somber reminder of what can go wrong when a cherished story is mishandled. The movie lacks the emotional depth, chemistry, and narrative coherence necessary to captivate audiences. Despite its impressive production design and trippy soundscape, these elements alone are not enough to salvage the film or make it worth watching.
As it stands, The Crow is currently running in theaters, but potential viewers should be prepared for a cinematic experience that’s more of a test of endurance than a source of entertainment. While die-hard fans of the franchise might still find reasons to give this reboot a chance, those seeking a movie with engaging storytelling and vivid character dynamics might want to reconsider their options. The Crow might have had grand ambitions, but it ultimately drowns in its own shortcomings, making it one of the more disappointing attempts at reigniting a beloved series in recent memory.
